YOUR ATTITUDE, BEHAVIOUR, ACTIONS = BEAUTY

In a retail environment if a customer approaches me with an aggressive tone, I won’t react. Then they increase in volume as if to try to shame me into submission, I won’t react. The louder they get, the harder they fall. They know exactly what they want and they have envisioned exactly what I will say, I won’t react.

If a person has to yell to be heard (when I am silent) or if they feel the need to escalate a situation to physical violence, then the point that they are trying to make is invalid. Don’t think for me, ask me.

Once this customer has left my store, the remaining customers will long remember that persons behaviour and mine. You don’t put out a fire with more fire, a fire burns quickly and burns itself out. Especially when a fire is met with calm and clear direction.

That all sounds too easy, optimistic and unrealistic...doesn’t it?

Easy it is not. I get upset as much as anybody else. But absorbing this persons anger into myself and letting it manifest is simply perpetuating a cycle of anger. This persons bad behaviour wins in that case and we keep spreading that negativity in little ways. From little things, big things grow.

I am overly qualified in sarcasm and dry wit which generally negates the traditional image of what one would perceive as a motivational speaker who seeks to push positivity out into the world. In fact, that is what keeps me on track. Negativity can drag you down as much as unbridled positivity. Everything in moderation.

I hope and trust that everything will work out in the future for me, but experience tells me at times it won’t. In those times I will feel what I need to feel-anger, hurt, confusion, loss-but that time must pass and I will remember who I am.

My situation in tough times doesn’t define who I am, my behaviour as I move forward does define me. 

There is an ocean of negativity in the world, I can’t change that, but I can change the world around me by setting boundaries with my family, my firends and work colleagues in terms of what I find unacceptable- “You are such a RETARD”, “I am so stupid”, “I feel so sorry for people with disabilities, so sad” (They have love and support, ignorance enforced on others makes me sad. But it is easily fixed with awareness. Ask) “That’s so gay”, “OMG there are so many asians in China Town” (I have seriously heard this several times!), “Give it a go, but it’s not really you” (funny that, I don’t know what really is me until I’m about 90 years old I think), “She is so mental”, “I should just settle”..

My First Time Competing For Australia. 

Two Time International Bronze Medalist 

The greatest athletes in the world have had to conquer their greatest rival, themselves. How else can a tennis player compete for hours on end if it was not for their mental strength enduring as much as their physical strength. Mental health is as important, if not more, than your physical health. But mostly we tread water through life in the ocean of negativity. Where do you start?

Some motivational speakers work to a formula and believe that with the daily repetition of positive affirmations, that with time you can break your internal negative voice that whispers to us at times. I like to think of them as ghosts of the past who are great for reminding us of where we where, but no thanks as we now choose to walk in a different direction. 

Looking in the mirror and telling myself every morning that “I am a strong, confident, beautiful person” won’t make me envision myself as Brad Pitt. But for someone who has been told that they are stupid and won’t amount to much by their friends and family, it may be a helpful tool for them. My approach is that of my own personal experience backed by a mother who worked too hard all of her life for me to be living anything less than my full potential. 

I realised when I started my blog, and I connected with people who wanted better for themselves, that I was indeed lucky to have my mother who let me make continuous mistakes and go against logic at times for her strong foundation of positivity and beliefs only really came to fruition when things in my life fell apart.

Victims dwell and can make life around them a slow and painful hell as problems and challenges are viewed as punishment. I on the other hand see a challenge and immediately say to the universe “Challenge accepted” as I point my finger forward.